Bohemians and Hillbillies(FOR: rule 59)

A few years ago, my friend Van Galbraith, a former U.S. ambassador to France, invited me to go with him and his friend Villiam F.Buckley,Jr. to the Bohemian Grove, and exclusive retreat in a large Sequoia forest near San Francisco. The Bohemian Clue operates "camps" for its members and their guests each summer, and I was lucky enough to join Van and Bill in the "Hillilly Camp."

Van and I had not seen each other in a while because I was in the midst of producing Crazy For You on Broadway, so he thought it would fun and interesting for us to get together at this place that was special to him. He also thought that the weekend would give me a chance to get to know Bill Buckley better, as we had gone to the same college but never spent any time together.

It truned out that our four days of togetherness made for wonderful bonding with my old friend Van and discovery of a new friend in Bill. Bill was entertaining, thoughtful, intelligent, well informed, and contrary to my presuppositions, very interested in other people's opinions. 

The Bohemian Grove adventure was full of many interesting and lively discussions, and this shared experience that Van created for us enhanced my friendship with him and allowed me to form a new unexpected one with Bill, both of which continue to this day.

Become a matchmaker

The most obvious connections are based on areas of mutual interest. If you have a friend who is passionate about his collection of Hopi pottery, it's an obvious step to introduce him to your archeologist friend who is researching the Hopi tribe. But keep in your mind that many a successful match is based on the theory that opposites attact. Perhaps your outdoorsy friend from work will make a connection with the poet who never leaves her house. Arrange for them to meet and be prepared for a surprise.

If you plan a one-on-one meeting for friends, it might b wise to keep the exposure limited. A quick coffee date or a lunch could be the appropriate venue. That way, if, Heaven forbid, they meet and discover an instant antipathy, they won't have to spend too much time in each other's company.

A group setting, like a dinner party, is another excellent way to introduce people to each other. Don't assume that your job is done when you send out the invitations. When you make introductions at the party, be sure to give these potential friends a  basic for communication beyond small talk. In these situations, you are the connector and, therefore, have the obligation initiate the conversation.

--from "The art of friend",Roger Horchow & Sally Horchow.